


my darling, let the band play on (‘cos it’s clear we stole the show)

by The_Ominous_Owl



Series: but we'll hold our pose, and await rapturous applause [2]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Actors, Alternate Universe - Celebrity, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Established Relationship, F/F, SuperCorp, side Alex/Lucy, social media (ish)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-09
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-01-31 04:02:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12674013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Ominous_Owl/pseuds/The_Ominous_Owl
Summary: Kara’s happy. She has a great job, a girlfriend who loves her, and castmates who only occasionally post her drunken antics on Instagram. But everyone knows that happy doesn’t get clicks, and when the unstoppable force of an audience’s expectations runs up against the immovable object of a network’s vision, everybody loses except the paparazzi.orthe one where the network meddles, Lena despairs, and Kara just wants the fandom to find an ounce of goddamn chill.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i have no idea where i'm going with this fic but a bunch of you said you’d read a sequel if i wrote one so i did the thing cos i love y'all. but before i say anything else i gotta give a massive shout out to [ lordsantiagoaz](https://lordsantiagoaz.tumblr.com/), who did some fucking awesome [ fan art](https://lordsantiagoaz.tumblr.com/post/165461022261/its-over-starfeed-exclusive-photos-on-the-red) for the first fic that everyone needs to go look at. right now, we’ll wait. 
> 
> speaking of, this is a sequel, so y’all should definitely go read the first part if you wanna have any context at all, but if you just assume everyone's an actor you'll come pretty close. except alex, she's a detective. also mike is mon-el.
> 
> i still don't know how to tv show, and i also don't know how to detective, so many liberties have been taken. just go with it, it'll be fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter has a bunch of exposition-y stuff(sry), but now it's outta the way the others should have fewer huge paragraphs.

Dusklight _Star Kara DanversTalks Sizzle,_ Supergirl, _and Sisters_

_[…] When asked about Sizzle, the explosively popular pairing between Sara and Isabelle, Danvers lights up._

_“I love the name the fans came up with,” she confesses conspiratorially. “Lena pretends she thinks it’s silly, but really she loves it too. She thinks it’s clever.” She laughs. “She’s gonna kill me for saying that.”_

_The chemistry between the two actresses is clear, and is obviously the basis for the on-screen pairing. The pair are famously friends, despite a troubled history between them, and the easy affection with which Danvers talks about her co-star is heart-warming in the extreme._

_“I’m so lucky to work with Lena,” Danvers tells us. “Sizzle is so important to so many people, and working with Lena and Cat, who both take it so seriously and are so careful with it is such a blessing.”_

_We asked the charming star if she could share any tidbits for the couple, but Danvers plays coy._

_“Gosh, Cat would kill me. Good things. Fun things,” she promises._

Dusklight _airs on NCB, Tuesdays at 9\8c._

**…**

“Remind me why I wanted to be an actor, again?” Kara asked with a groan, rolling onto her back as the crew scurried around her, resetting the scene. Her holster was digging painfully into her hip, a lock of her hair had escaped its bun and kept catching in her lip gloss, and her back ached from being repeatedly thrown against the unusually sturdy set wall.

“Money, fame, the glamorous high life, an adoring fan-base, you get to hang out with me all day…” Lucy listed, coming to stand beside her. The suit she was wearing was artfully dishevelled, a result of the scripted scuffle between her character and a suspect, but she was still in better shape than Kara.

Kara just groaned in response, shoving her prop gun back into its holster then looking up at her co-star pitifully, making grabby hands until Lucy rolled her eyes and pulled her to her feet. They were filming in a warehouse on an unseasonably warm day, and the temperature had passed ‘uncomfortable’ hours ago. Sweat was dampening the back of her shirt, and Kara shielded her eyes against the hot set lights as she looked hopefully over to where Snapper was hunched behind his screens, reviewing the last take. Taking advantage of the delay, the hair-and-makeup assistant hurried over to fix Kara’s hair in case the director called for another take, and Kara sighed but let him fuss, knowing the odds were against an early finish.

Eventually Snapper straightened and shook his head. “Let’s go again, people!” he called, eliciting a quiet groan from the crew and a more audible one from his actors as the camera cranes swung back to their starting positions. “Go from Sara jumping in.”

Kara shook her limbs out as she returned to her mark, watching as Lucy let the day-player playing their suspect back her up against the wall. He was a giant of a man, especially compared to Lucy, but he was almost overly gentle with his scene partners, to the point where he’d earned a reprimand from Snapper for not being forceful enough in the earlier takes. But gentle or not, he was still a built like a line-backer, and Kara wondered who in the casting department she’d annoyed enough to set her up to tackle a human mountain.

Lucy waited until Snapper called action, then began struggling against her captor. Kara waited a beat, giving him time to growl his lines, then ran into frame, grabbing his arm and twisting it in a way that would look good on-screen but felt wildly ineffective in person. She shoved him away from Lucy, who slid down the wall as the cameras followed them, and they tussled briefly in a choreographed fight under the allegedly watchful eye of their new stunt co-ordinator. His name was Lars, and he’d joined the production three episodes into the current season, after the previous co-ordinator got an offer to work on a film series. Kara was quietly dubious of Lars’ credentials, especially after she’d found out that his main recommendation had come from the fact that he was a relation of Mike’s. Her reservations had only grown as she became more familiar with him, having noticed he’d yet to encounter a bottle he didn’t like, but she’d been assured that he was very highly qualified, so she’d let her doubts lie.

When Kara spared him a quick glance between blows, he had his back to them with his phone to his ear, and wasn’t paying either actor the scantest bit of attention. She couldn’t dwell on his inattention for long, though, because they’d reached the point in the fight when Kara had to let her scene partner grab her arm and twist, throwing her against the wall of the set. She thumped against it with a huff that wasn’t faked, and let her legs fold under her, sinking to the floor as her assailant loomed over her. He kicked at her once, careful not to actually make contact, then turned back to Lucy as Kara fumbled with the gun on her hip.

“Hey!” she gasped, wincing internally at how breathless she sounded. Some scary detective she was. “Back off.” She pointed the prop gun at him and he sneered, growling one last threat running from the ‘alley’. The camera lingered on Kara’s face for a moment, then Snapper called the cut.

It took another three takes before the finicky director finally released them, and Kara wanted nothing more than to retreat to her apartment and sink into a hot bath. She didn’t have to be back on set until the day after tomorrow, and she was already mentally calculating exactly how long she could soak before she’d be late for dinner with Alex when her phone chimed from where it sat on her folding chair. Kara groaned again as she leaned over to retrieve it, but she quickly forgot how sore she was when she read the message.

It was from Eve, Cat Grant’s assistant, and simply read, ‘ _Lena in Cat’s office 911.’_

Kara groaned softly, her plans for an easy afternoon melting away. Lucy saw her shoulders drop and tilted her head.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, gathering her things.

“Lena’s going to get herself fired,” Kara groaned, typing out a quick reply to Eve.

Lucy huffed out a laugh. “She must’ve just read the latest script,” she said, and Kara glanced up from her phone.

“Why, what’s in the latest script?” she asked, somewhat alarmed, but Lucy shook her head.

“It’s probably better if Cat explains it. Then you can tell me, ‘coz I can’t wait to hear the reason behind it.”

Kara wanted to press her further, but her phone chimed again from her hand. It was another text from Eve made purely of exclamation marks, and Kara groaned again. “Can you tell Alex I might be late?”

Lucy nodded, and Kara smiled her thanks as she grabbed her bag and trotted off set, heading for the writers’ office.

**…**

Cat’s office was on the second floor of the studio, and was off-limits to just about everyone. Kara had been in there exactly once with the rest of her co-stars for a lecture about intra-cast unity after some particularly damaging pictures had been leaked to the press. Said pictures had led to the very public break-up of the two leads of the show, Mike Matthews and Lena Luthor, and the resulting media frenzy had taken weeks to calm down. Only a handful of people were aware that their relationship had been a lie from the start, a publicity stunt orchestrated by Mike’s mother in an effort to tack a Luthor’s influence onto her name. Lena had gone along with it largely due to self-loathing, as far as Kara could work out, and probably would have continued with the charade indefinitely had Cat not decided to hook her and Kara’s characters up on the show, forcing the pair of them to deal with the growing feelings between them.

The months that followed had been an exercise in patience for Kara, with Lena publicly dating Mike and actually dating her, but Rhea – and therefore Mike, who was largely uninvested in the charade but unwilling to go against his mother – had actively resisted Lena’s attempts to extract herself from the PR relationship, and Lena couldn’t force it without risking the reputations of everyone involved. It was Mike who’d finally given her an out, albeit accidentally, when he was photographed screwing one of the guest stars in a prop room. The pictures had been leaked to the press on the eve of a red carpet event, and Lena had taken full advantage of her co-star’s indiscretion, using the presence of the cameras to publicly and irrevocably break up with him in a way that not even Rhea could circumvent.

The storm of media attention had taken over a month to abate, and neither Kara nor Lena was in any hurry to ignite another one by announcing their relationship. Thankfully, Kara had discovered that an on-screen relationship was an excellent cover for a real one, because the press had attributed the affection that Kara was terrible at hiding to their characters spilling into real life, and she was happy not to correct them. She was fairly sure there was a small group of their fans that had cottoned onto them, but there was no open speculation, and she and Lena were both content to leave things as they were.

Leaving things as they were would be much harder if Lena got herself fired, though. Kara could hear raised voices echoing down the hallway as she approached Cat’s office, and she shared an alarmed look with Eve as she drew level with her desk.

“Can I…?” Kara asked, motioning towards the office, and Eve nodded vigorously. The assistant usually played gatekeeper to Cat’s domain, but Kara wasn’t surprised Lena had got past her. Ever since it had come out that it had been Eve who took and leaked the photos, she’d been unable to even look at Lena, much less deny her anything. She didn’t seem to realise that Lena didn’t hold it against her, and in fact had been the one to argue most vehemently for the assistant to keep her job.

Kara hurried down the short corridor and knocked on the door, but received no response. She pushed it open slowly in time to hear her girlfriend declare, “I am _not_ doing this.”

“You _will_ , if—” Cat cut herself off as Kara edged into the room. “You called backup?” she asked shortly, flicking her narrowed eyes between Kara and Lena, who stilled from her restless pacing as Kara nudged the door shut behind her.

“She didn’t, Eve messaged me,” Kara said quickly, moving to stand next to Lena. “What’s going on?”

Cat rolled her eyes, but before she could answer, Lena turned to Kara. “Have you read this?” she demanded, brandishing a sheaf of paper, and Kara shook her head as she recognised the cover of the latest _Dusklight_ script. They’d only received it that morning, and Kara hadn’t had time to read beyond the title, _Ergo Proptor Hoc._

“I’ve been filming all day, I haven’t had a chance,” she explained, confused by the apparent non-sequitur. “Why?”

“She’s breaking us up,” Lena said shortly, and Kara’s stomach dropped even as Cat rolled her eyes again.

“You’re being dramatic, I’m not breaking you up,” Cat insisted, but Lena cut her off, leafing briefly through the script and beginning to quote from the cold open.

“Apartment interior, morning. We open on a shot of Jax and Isabelle sharing breakfast, settled in obvious domestic bliss. _Obvious domestic bliss_. What the hell, Cat?” She made to throw the script on Cat’s desk, but Kara caught her arm and took it from her, flipping it open to read for herself. “It took you three seasons to include any sort of representation, you can’t undo it after a season and a half, and certainly not to pair me up with _Mike_.”

“I’m _not_ ,” Cat said, clearly dangerously close to the limits of her patience. Anyone else would’ve been thrown out her office long before now, Kara knew, but the showrunner had an unspoken soft spot for Lena. It was largely through her backing that Lena had survived the fallout from her brother’s downfall, and Kara knew her girlfriend got far more leeway with Cat than just about anyone else. “It’s a For Want of a Nail episode, which you’d know if you’d finished reading it before coming in here to castigate me,” Cat explained as Kara scanned the pages. “A throwaway, fantasy, ‘What If’ episode that has no real impact on the overall plot. Specifically, what if Sara hadn’t become Jax’s partner.”

“And the answer was that I fall madly in love with him?” Lena spat incredulously.

Kara took note of the fact that Lena kept referring to her character in the first person, and she was beginning to realise why she was taking the script more personally than she probably should be. Lena put a lot of herself into Isabelle, and while that was a large part of why her character was so popular, it also meant that this episode would feel alarmingly like going back to the PR relationship she’d only managed to extract herself from with some delicate manoeuvring and a huge amount of luck.

Cat sighed and took off the glasses she liked to pretend she didn’t wear. “Look, this wasn’t my idea. There’s a new executive at the network, and he wants to ‘float the suggestion’ and see how it goes with the general audience.” Lena muttered something about what he could do with his suggestion, and Kara snorted as Cat smiled wanly. “Normally I’d agree with you, but he’s holding the _City in Chains_ pickup over my head.”

 _City in Chains_ was a new show that Cat’s production company, CatCo, was working on. Part spin-off, part alternate-universe for _Dusklight_ , it would be the third show to air under the CatCo banner. The idea that NCB wouldn’t pick up the pilot was almost laughable, given how mutually profitable the relationship between the network and Cat had been, but thinking about it, Kara realised that they had yet to make the official announcement.

“Please. You’re Cat Grant, they don’t say no to you,” Lena scoffed, but Cat pinned her with a level glare.

“Contrary to popular belief, I am not all powerful. Even I have limits, and I was pushing them getting this relationship on-screen at all. Keeping it there means picking my battles, and doing this now means I can take the wind out of this idiot’s sails before he gets the attention of someone with real power.”

“Lena, really, it’s not that bad,” Kara assured her, having scanned a good two-thirds of the script and found nothing overt beyond one kiss in the cold open scene and some very cheesy dialogue. “And look, Isabelle’s still not straight. She has a moment here with…Lucy? Really?” Kara looked over at Cat with a raised eyebrow, and the showrunner sighed again.

“I didn’t write it. I created a broad outline and gave it to the most junior writer I could find and told her to indulge herself. That… _cringe-inducing_ abomination you’re holding is the result.” She flapped a dismissive hand towards the script Kara was still holding, distaste written all over her face. “Trust me, I want to shoot it less than you do, but this way the episode will flop and the idiot from the network will crawl back into whatever heteronormative hell he came from.”

Kara could see the logic of Cat’s plan, as much as she disliked it, but Lena still looked dubious. “Cat…” she started, but the showrunner cut her off.

“Luthor, this is one of those times you’re just going to have to trust me,” she said, sliding her glasses back on and returning her attention to her laptop in a clear dismissal. “Now go away. I have to try and salvage the rest of the season arc now I’ve lost an episode to this nonsense.”

Kara could tell from the expression on her face that Lena wanted to keep arguing, but when Kara slipped her hand into the crook of her arm she sighed and relaxed into the touch. She allowed Kara to tug her gently towards the door, but before they got there she turned back to make one last point.

“The fans will riot. This relationship is important to a lot of people,” Lena offered as a final objection, and Cat looked pointedly at where Kara’s hand was curled around her arm.                                                                                                                                     

“Maybe you should give them something else to talk about, then.”

Lena stiffened and narrowed her eyes, but Kara kept the gentle pressure on her arm, tugging her towards the door before she said something in anger that she’d later regret. While Cat didn’t officially know about their off-screen relationship, very little happened on the set that the showrunner was unaware of, and Kara had a sneaking suspicion that she’d been onto them since before even Kara had been aware of what was growing between them.

“I don’t believe her,” Lena hissed as the door swung shut behind them. “She can’t do this, it’s insane!”

“She’s right, though,” Kara said, sliding her hand down Lena’s arm so she could tangle their fingers together. “If the network has their heart set on this, this is the best way to nip it in the bud.”

“It’s ridiculous,” Lena insisted, but fell silent when she realised that Eve wasn’t alone at her desk.

Mike Matthews, the other co-lead of the show, straightened from where he’d been leaning over Eve’s desk as they left Cat’s office. The assistant had a soft blush staining her cheeks, and she looked flustered as Kara and Lena drew closer. Kara pointedly avoided looking at either of them; thanks to the pictures Eve had leaked to the press, she already knew far more than she was comfortable with about Mike’s dalliances and she had no desire to find out what he’d said to paint such a pretty shade of red across her face. Their relationship was the kind of on-again-off-again mess that could charitably be called complicated, and popular opinion on set – especially since Mike had been caught sleeping with Veronica Sinclair, his guest starring on-screen nemesis – was that Eve could do better and crazy for staying with him. Lena disagreed, suggesting that Eve probably had more power in their dynamic that she was letting on, and given that Lena was probably the only person who had more than a passing familiarity with all three people involved, Kara was inclined to trust her judgement.

Eve busied herself with her laptop as Mike stepped away from her desk, holding his hands up defensively when Lena glared at him.

“I had nothing to do with the script,” he said, looking between them. “I came to tell Cat to scrap it, but Eve said you two beat me here. What’d she say?”

“Orders from on high,” Lena told him, contempt dripping from her tone. She’d dropped Kara’s hand when Mike turned to face them, and Kara was actively resisting the desire to press herself against her side and wrap an arm around her waist. “The network wants it, it’s out of her hands.”

“Well that’s just stupid. I’ll talk to her, she’ll listen to me,” Mike said, and Kara stepped out of his way, gesturing back down the hall towards the office.

“You’re welcome to try,” she told him, knowing that if Lena hadn’t managed to change her mind, Mike had no chance.

Lena shook her head and headed in the opposite direction, and Kara shot Eve a smile full of gratitude and sympathy before she hurried after her.

She caught up with her just as the elevator doors were sliding open, and Kara tangled their hands together once Lena hit the button for the ground floor. They swayed together as the elevator lurched into motion, but Lena didn’t pull away once they’d steady themselves, instead letting her weight rest against Kara’s side. Kara freed her hand so she could wrap her arm around Lena’s waist, and Lena let out a long sigh before letting her head drop onto Kara’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” she murmured as Kara pressed her lips against her hair.

“It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay,” Kara told her, and Lena sighed again. “Come over when you’re done in Wardrobe,” she offered, suddenly wanting nothing more than to spend the evening with her girlfriend and her sister.

Lena raised her head and looked at her, confused. “Aren’t you going out with Alex?” she asked, but Kara shook her head.

“I’m gonna see if she wants to order in. I really just wanna drink wine and watch The Good Place.”

Kara felt more than heard Lena’s hum of pleasure at the thought. “I don’t know how late I’ll be. You know how Pam gets,” she warned, but Kara shrugged. “Okay. Don’t drink all the wine before I get there.”

“No promises,” Kara answered with a smile, then leaned in to steal a quick kiss before the doors slid open.

They separated outside the building, Lena heading for Wardrobe while Kara trotted towards the carpark, fishing her phone out of her bag as she went. She sent a quick message Alex inviting her to her apartment instead of the restaurant they’d planned on, no longer in the mood to brave the fans and paparazzi that would inevitably ambush them if they went out for dinner.    

**…**

Kara could hear Alex ranting well before her sister got to her door. Her words were muffled, but the fact that Kara could hear here at all meant that she was far more worked up than she usually let herself become. Kara looked over as the key scraped in the lock and the door swung open, revealing Alex talking furiously into her phone.

“No. I’ve gotta go. _I’ve gotta go._ I’ve—ugh.” She pulled the phone away from her ear and stabbed the screen, muting the muffled male voice on the other end.

“I ordered Indian. Are you okay?” Kara asked, somewhat alarmed as Alex flopped down next to her and pulled the throw pillow from her grip so she could press it over her face.

“I’m gonna shoot Jim Harper,” Alex growled, muffled by the pillow, and Kara relaxed. Jim Harper was Lucy’s publicist, and Alex had been threatening to shoot him since the week after she and Lucy went public with their relationship.

“You can’t shoot him,” Kara told her with fond exasperation, tugging Alex’s arms away from her face. “Lucy would hate having to visit you in jail.”

“Arrest him? He’s definitely done _something_ illegal, I could—”

“Alex.”

Alex buried her head in the pillow again and growled in frustration until Kara tugged it from her grip and tossed it to the other end of the couch.

“What’s he done?” Kara asked her, and Alex pulled a face.

“He wants me to start dressing ‘more appropriately’ at work in case the paps take interest in me again,” Alex grumbled, looking annoyed. “I’m a detective, not a fashion model. If I wanna wear jeans, I’m gonna wear fucking jeans. It’s bad enough that I can’t go undercover anymore…”

Kara was actually privately relieved that Alex’s relationship with Lucy meant that she was too well known to risk undercover work, but she kept that thought to herself. Alex was unusually wound up, considering she and Harper had been having the same argument about her effect on Lucy’s ‘image’, as Harper called it, since they came out, and Kara didn’t want to antagonise her further by pointing out that she was happy Alex wasn’t disappearing for weeks at a time.

“You’ve been arguing with him about that for months now. There’s something else,” Kara insisted, and Alex slumped down.

“I had to recuse myself from another case today,” she said quietly after a long pause, fidgeting with her fingers in her lap. “I was working on this embezzlement case, but it turned out the main suspect’s brother wrote that dog movie Lucy was in last summer. Jonn said it was a ‘potential conflict of interest’, and benched me. It the fourth case this month, I can’t…”

Alex let out a long, frustrated sigh, and Kara curled herself around her side. “Have you told Lucy?”

“No,” Alex admitted quietly, sighing again when she saw Kara’s face. “How will that help? It’ll just stress her out. I can’t ask her to stop working, but as long as she _is_ working I’m connected to half the people I’m investigating. This city is too damn small.” She rubbed a hand down her face before dropping her hand back to her lap, fiddling with the hem of her shirt. “Maggie thinks she can get me a spot in Vice.”

“You _hated_ working Vice,” Kara objected, straightening so she could look at her sister properly.

“What else can I do, Kara?” Alex demanded. “I can’t stay in White Collar while I’m with Lucy; I’m not breaking up with Lucy to save my job. My only options are quit or switch departments.”

“This is stupid. You arrested Lex Luthor when your sister,” Kara pointed at herself, “was his highest-grossing actor. I was way more connected to him than Lucy is to that guy’s brother.”

“I know, and that got me a lot of leeway, but…” Alex rubbed a hand across her eyes. “A couple of months ago I arrested a talent agent for a very creative money laundering scheme he was involved in. It turned out that he rep’d an actress that beat Lucy for a part in the new _Star_ _Wars_ or something. His hack of a lawyer said I had a vendetta against her client and nearly got the case thrown out. Jonn’s been extra careful since then, which means I spend more time babysitting the forensic accountants than actually doing my job.”

Kara felt a flash of guilt in her stomach. She remembered Alex telling her that story when it happened, and mentioning more frequently that she had been taken off cases, but she hadn’t put the pattern together until now. She’d been too distracted by her job and Lena.

“I’m sorry,” Kara started, but Alex shook her head and pulled her into a hug.

“It’s not your fault. Don’t worry about it, I’ll work it out.”

Kara sank into the hug, but before she could reply she was interrupted by the sound of the buzzer. “Food! Food will make you feel better,” she insisted, jumping up off the couch, and Alex shook her head with a fond smile as she rose to retrieve the wine.

**…**

They were halfway through their second bottle when Kara remembered. “Oh, Lena’s coming when she’s finished on set. We have to save her some wine.” At Alex’s curious head tilt, Kara elaborated, “The new script is stupid.”

“Aliens?”

“Not that stupid. Timey-wimey stuff. She has to kiss Mike. And maybe Lucy.”

“ _What?_ ”

“I said it was stupid.”

“Show me,” Alex demanded, and Kara was buzzed enough to acquiesce. She giggled as Alex pulled faces at the cheesy dialogue and nodded her agreement at her outrage about the pairing. But Kara’s goal was to cheer Alex up, so when Lena arrived some time later, she opened the door to find the pair of them drunkenly acting out one of the more ridiculous scenes. Alex squawked in surprise and fell off the couch as she entered the apartment, and the sound of Lena’s surprised laughter washed warmly over Kara’s heart.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hooray, i survived! sorry this took so long, friends and lovers, i was doing some hard-core adulting that took up a bunch of my time, but it should be mostly calmed down now so hopefully the next chapter won't take three months.  
> so this chapter got away from me a bit ~~a lot~~ and i had to stop it sooner than i meant to, but on the plus side that means the next chapter is sort of a little bit written! hooray!
> 
> i love you guys enjoy don't kill me

_ Romance Rekindled on Set? _

_Is there romance in the air on the set of_ Dusklight? _Behind-the-scenes pics uploaded anonymously to several social network sites yesterday would seem to indicate yes. The leaked images appear to show the series leads, Mike Matthews and Lena Luthor, locked in a passionate embrace. The pair were in a relationship before Matthews’ well publicised affair with a guest star led to a very public breakup almost eighteen months ago, though the unhappy couple continued to work together closely._

_Reports from the set are confused, with some claiming that the pics are from an upcoming episode and the actors are in-character, but given that Luthor’s character is already in a relationship on the show, we here at_ Starfeed _find that hard to believe. Other reports are claiming that the co-stars never actually split up, and the scene on the red carpet was merely a ploy to draw viewers to the show and deflect attention from rumours of an engagement._

Starfeed _reached out to the production and the actors, but all declined to comment. We’ll keep our readers updated as this story unfolds._

**…**

The first time Kara woke the next morning, it was because she was overheated and in a tangle of too many limbs. She cracked an eye open blearily and glanced over her shoulder, relieved to find that the arm wrapped around her stomach belonged to Lena, but there was something digging into her chest and what felt like another hand fisted in the fabric of her shirt. She blinked slowly, but it took her a second to recognise the other two blurry lump in her bed. The closer one was Alex, and it was her shoulder that was jutting into Kara’s boob, while the other one was Lucy, who was curled against Alex’s other side with her arm flung across her stomach.

“When did Lucy get here?” Kara croaked, her memories fuzzy with sleep and alcohol, but Alex just shifted slightly without opening her eyes and brought a hand up, aiming for Kara’s mouth but covering most of her face instead.

“Shh, still sleeping,” she mumbled, before rolling over and wrapping her arm around Lucy’s stomach. Lucy murmured something unintelligible and released Kara’s shirt to cling to Alex’s instead.

Still confused but more comfortable now she was no longer sandwiched between two bodies, Kara snuggled back into Lena’s embrace, smiling softly when the arm around her waist tightened gently. The light outside the window was still an inky grey, and sleep was tugging at Kara’s eyes, so when Lena murmured soft, sleepy sounds and nuzzled into her hair, Kara relaxed and let herself drift off again.

The second time she woke to fingers trailing across her cheek, brushing the hair from her face, and she opened her eyes to find Lena leaning over her and smiling softly.

“Good morning, darling,” she murmured, tracing a pattern down Kara’s jaw as Kara blinked sleep from her eyes. There were muffled sounds from outside the bedroom that Kara hoped were Alex making breakfast and not Lucy destroying her kitchen, but she was too comfortable and warm to check.

“G’morning,” Kara said, her voice rough from disuse. “Are you leaving? What time is it?” she asked, noticing that Lena was showered and dressed.

“It’s not late, but I’m due on set,” Lena said as Kara shuffled into a more upright position. “I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye.”

Kara smiled, then reached up and curled her fingers in Lena’s jacket, tugging her gently forward. Lena hummed softly and Kara deepened the kiss, grazing Lena’s bottom lip with her teeth. Lena indulged her for a moment, then pulled away.

“I’ve gotta go,” she said admonishingly, but there was amusement in her eyes and Kara pouted.

“One more?”

“ _One_ more,” Lena agreed, trying to look stern but unable to keep the smile off her face. She leaned down again to brush their lips together, but when Kara threaded her free hand into her hair she made no move to pull away. Emboldened, Kara trailed her hand down from her jacket to wrap around her waist and gently tugged Lena down onto her lap.

“Kara…” she started, but Kara leaned in to capture her lips again. “You’re gonna make me late,” she breathed between kisses, but she made no move to escape Kara’s arms.

“They can start without you.”

“No they can’t,” Lena said, amusement dancing in her eyes, but she threaded her fingers through Kara’s hair and pulled her closer anyway. 

Lena was well on her way to missing her call time, working her way down Kara’s throat with her lips as Kara’s hand crept up her shirt, when the door creaked open behind them.

“Get a room,” Lucy called from the doorway as the broke apart, and Kara twisted so she could shoot her a look as Lena rolled her eyes.

“We _had_ a room until you interrupted,” Lena pointed out.

“And this is _my_ apartment,” Kara added, but Lucy just flapped a hand at them.

“Details. Anyway, get up. Alex made breakfast and I wanna hear the story of why we’re shooting a pulp romance novel.”

“And I really do have to go,” Lena added, stealing one last kiss from Kara. “I’ll see you tonight,” she murmured before wriggling off her lap and heading for the door, dropping a kiss on Lucy’s cheek as she passed.

Alone in the bed once more, Kara groaned and flopped down onto her pillows, wriggling back under the covers. She lay there for a long moment, blissfully comfortable in her cocoon of warmth, until the duvet was whipped off her and tossed to the end of the bed.

“C’mon Supergirl, up. It’s time to start the day,” Lucy insisted in an obnoxiously cheerful voice, but Kara just groaned and buried her face in her pillow.

“When did you even get here?” Kara asked, raising her head ever-so-slightly so Lucy could understand her.

“Lena called me for backup. Apparently you two were singing. There may or may not be video.” Kara raised her head again to glare balefully at her, and Lucy took the opportunity to yank the pillow out from under her. “C’mon, get up. You’ll feel better.”

Kara groaned again but acquiesced, letting her co-star tug her off the bed and out to the kitchen, where Alex was sitting at the counter, hunched lazily over her tablet with a stack of toast beside her.

“You said Alex made breakfast,” Kara said, shooting Lucy an accusing look.

“I did. Toast is breakfast,” Alex said, not looking up until Lucy wrapped herself around her shoulders and pressed a kiss to her temple. They both had hair damp from a shower, and Lucy was wearing one of Kara’s shirts. The fabric hung loose around her smaller frame, dipping low enough that Kara could see what looked suspiciously like a fresh hickey on her collar bone.

“Did you two defile my shower?” she asked, but then shook her head when Lucy grinned wickedly at her. “Never mind. I don’t want to know.”

Kara slid onto the stool next to Alex and snagged a slice of toast as Lucy retrieved Kara’s copy of the script from wherever it had ended up. It looked slightly worse for wear after its treatment the previous night, but still held up fairly well as Lucy waved it around.

“So what’s the story with this nonsense? Why am I kissing your girlfriend?”

Kara groaned and dropped her head onto the counter. “The network is being stupid,” she said, then launched into an abridged version of the explanation Cat had given them.

“Well that’s just idiotic,” Lucy declared when she’d finished. “But I could almost let it go if it wasn’t so badly written. I mean—” she rifled through the script and opened to a random page, “—‘ _you have someone who cares for you and so we must stop this dalliance.’_ Nobody talks like that! I could excuse a bad plot but this is just shitty writing.”

“I think that’s the point. Cat wants it to flop.”

“It’s gonna work. We’ll be lucky if they don’t cancel us altogether after this,” Lucy said, tossing the script onto the coffee table as Alex snorted.

“It’s not that bad. You’re being dramatic,” she said, and Lucy grinned and wrapped herself around her shoulder again.

“Would you prefer subtle?” she purred into Alex’s ear, and Kara blanched and slid off her stool.

“I’m having a shower. Please respect my kitchen,” she called over her shoulder, earning a grin from Lucy and a blush from her sister.

Kara took her time in the shower, both because the hot water was doing wonders for her hangover and because she didn’t want to walk back into something she couldn’t unsee. When she did eventually emerge, she was careful to announce her presence, but the atmosphere she found in the kitchen was very different to the one she’d left.

“Can’t you just talk to him?” Alex was saying, irritation colouring her tone.

Lucy had moved to the other side of the room, and she crossed her arms as she replied. “I have, but Alex… there’s a reason I keep him around. Annoying as he is, Jim’s a good publicist and he does know what he’s talking about, most of the time.”

“Not with this, he doesn’t,” Alex snapped, pushing her hair back in a frustrated gesture.

“What’s wrong?” Kara asked, moving to stand next to her, but Alex shoved herself away from the counter and stood, gathering her things.

“Nothing. I’ve gotta go to work,” she said, wrapping her free arm around Kara in a short, perfunctory hug before turning to stalk towards the door.

“Alex, c’mon…” Lucy called after her, but Alex didn’t turn back.

“What was that about?” Kara asked after a short, painful silence.

“My publicist is being a dick, apparently,” Lucy sighed, rubbing her eyes. “It’s fine,” she added when she caught Kara’s concerned expression. “I’ll smooth it over, don’t worry about it.”

“Alex really doesn’t like being told what to do,” Kara said softly, and Lucy nodded.

“I know. Honestly Kara, don’t worry about it. I’ll fix it. Now…” Lucy took a deep breath, and Kara saw her make an effort to brighten her own mood, but she’d known her long enough to see the hurt underneath it. “I have nothing to do today, and you have subscriptions to like eight different streaming services, so unless you have plans we’re going to stay here and watch _Star Trek_.”

Recognising the unspoken request for company, Kara smiled at her fondly and tugged her over towards the couch. “Fine, but only if we can watch the new Disney film after,” she said, and Lucy groaned theatrically as Kara curled into her side and reached for the remote.

**…**

They finished filming on the current episode and moved on to _Ergo Propter Hoc_ , much to the cast’s displeasure. Lena took advantage of their weekend off to continue badgering Cat about changing details in the script in an attempt to make it even slightly less terrible, but she gave up after Cat sent a very pointed message, saying that if Lena didn’t stop bugging her, she’d put one of the sex scenes back in.

“ _’One of’_? How many _were_ there?” Kara asked when Lena showed her the showrunner’s reply, and Lena just shrugged helplessly, sharing Kara’s horror at discovering that at some point, the script had actually been _worse_.

Kara, for her part, was largely resigned to the fact that the inevitable train wreck of an episode was happening, and had turned her attention to the fallout. She knew the reaction the apparent sidelining of such a popular lesbian pairing would be ugly unless handled properly, and Kara was better positioned within the fandom to address it than Lena. Kara had always been very open about her support for the LGBT community, and was really only in her increasingly-transparent closet because so far, no reporter had been bold – or tactless – enough to ask her directly. Her fans were mostly polite enough to not openly speculate, but Kara knew from her sporadic forays into her tag on tumblr that there was a consensus that she was at the least a very good ally.

It was a sharp contrast to Lena, whom Alex had once described as ‘aggressively closeted’, which had earned her a frown but no disagreement. Though she adored her fans, and was always warm and supportive with them in person, she rarely spoke about Sizzle publicly unless forced to by the network. Kara knew she had reasons for her extreme caution, but she’d never pushed her to talk about it. Lucy had implied once that it had something to do with her family, but Kara hadn’t pressed for details, unwilling to dig into that part of Lena’s life without her permission.

Whatever the reasons, Lena’s reticence meant that when it came to talking about their on-screen relationship, Kara had a much better chance of getting the fan to trust her when she told them not to panic about the inevitably divisive episode once the promotion began. She began her private campaign by retweeting fan art, liking every Sizzle-related tweet she could find, and answering as many questions as she could. The fans responded positively, and Kara hoped that her new title of Captain of the Sizzle Ship gave her enough capital with the fanbase to smooth over the inevitable anger and confusion once the network began promoting the episode in earnest, doubtless with a focus on the Jaxabel elements.

The premise of the episode was that a group hunting Mike’s character, Jax, hit Sara with weapon that essentially removed her from the timeline. It was completely outside the established logic of the show, and Kara was fairly sure that the concept alone would confuse the general audience, even without the relationship shenanigans. For Kara it was a fairly boring week, acting wise, because she spent most of the episode as a ‘ghost’, present in the scenes but invisible to the other characters, and therefore had virtually no lines. It did mean that she avoided having to recite most of the incredibly tacky dialogue, some of which was so bad that most of the cast had to take breaks to compose themselves so they’d stop ruining the takes with laughter.

The only cast member who wasn’t constantly breaking was Lena. She’d dropped back into her Luthor Ice Queen act, and most of the crew were smart enough to give her a wide berth. The one exception to that was the director for the episode, Chet Miner, a first-time director to the show with only a couple of other credits to his name. Kara knew why Cat had gone out of her way to get him for this episode – nothing like a green director to pour more fuel on the trash fire – but given how uncomfortable this episode was going to be, Kara almost wished they’d tapped one of the regular directors for it. Miner was a perfectionist control-freak, and Kara got the impression he’d be difficult to work with at the best of times, let alone on an episode so universally disliked.

There were three kisses in the episode, all of them involving Lena, much to her displeasure. The first was the much-disputed cold open scene between Jax and Isabelle, which remained steadfastly in place despite both the leads’ attempts to get it cut from the script. The second was a scene halfway through the episode between Isabelle and Amara, Lucy’s character, though that scene had a note to shoot versions of the encounter both with and without the kiss, to give the editors more options. The third was in a scene added to the script the day before they started filming, a touching reunion scene between Isabelle and Sara that had Cat’s fingerprints all over it, and Kara appreciated it for the tacit apology it was, both to them and their fans.

**…**

Lena banned her from set the day they shot her scene with Lucy.

“It’s going to be weird enough already, and if you’re there she’ll make a threesome joke and I won’t be able to look Alex in the eye for weeks,” Lena said, and Kara agreed, because Lena was struggling with the episode in general and these scenes in particular as it was, and Kara was doing everything she could think of to make it easier on her.

She didn’t have that luxury the day they shot the cold open. Both the opening scene and the reunion between Sara and Isabelle were set in Isabelle’s apartment, and were scheduled to be filmed on the same day. Because Lena was in almost every scene of the episode, her time was tightly budgeted to avoid violating SAG regulations, which meant not only that they were shooting both scenes back-to-back, but that Lena would be doing it after being on set for fifteen hours the day before. They’d allocated her the shortest legally-allowable break between the two days, and while Kara didn’t want to disturb what little rest she’d get, she was also too wound up and anxious to spend the night by herself, so she went to Alex’s.

“It’s not the kissing thing,” Kara insisted, pacing behind the sectional couch Alex was sitting on and keeping her voice low, mindful of the fact that Lucy was asleep beside her. She and Alex had made up, judging by the way Lucy had her head in Alex’s lap and Alex was absentmindedly carding her fingers through her hair.

“I know.”

“It’s what the kissing represents.”

“Yeah.”

“Sizzle is the only main-text, slowburn, _canon_ lesbian relationship on prime-time television-”

“Yeah.”

“-because most of the others are either totally sub-textual or a blatant ratings grab-”

“Yeah.”

“-and this stupid network guy wants to derail it in the name of chasing ratings from a demo who tuned out ages ago by dangling a boring heteronormative cliché in front of them and…you’re not listening to me, are you?” Kara realised, glancing over at Alex and halting her restless pacing when she noticed her sister’s attention was spilt between the television and the tablet she’d rested on Lucy’s shoulder.

“Not really,” Alex admitted, looking up. “But in my defence, this is at least the third time I’ve heard this rant and I still don’t know what half those words mean. And I can’t take you seriously when you get all passionate about something called ‘Sizzle’.”

“I didn’t name it,” Kara pointed out, pouting. “And that’s not the point. It’s important, and the network doesn’t get it.”

“I know. C’mere,” Alex said, patting the spot beside her. “You just gotta trust that Cat knows what she’s doing.”

“People need to see themselves,” Kara muttered, ignoring Alex’s eye-roll when, instead of sitting, she opted to fall backwards over the back of the couch, landing upside-down with a huff. She froze for a moment and glanced at Lucy, but when she didn’t stir Kara continued, “How much sooner would you have worked yourself out if you’d had something to compare it to?”

“You mean I might have figure out the lesbian thing in college like a normal person instead of having Maggie spell it out for me in my early thirties?” Alex said sarcastically, but her smile took the sting out of her words.

“No, I mean… I don’t mean it’s bad, you worked it out when you were ready and that’s good, but it’s just…”

“It’s okay, I know what you mean. But you just have to trust that Cat knows what she’s doing and trust that your audience knows the difference between network bullshit and stories with actual substance.”

“Yeah …” Kara sighed, feeling her anger drain out of her slowly.

“And then you have to start sitting on couches like a normal person,” Alex added, and Kara narrowed her eyes playfully.

“Never,” she declared, nudging Alex’s shoulder with her knee. Alex just rolled her eyes again and dropped a throw pillow on her face.

**…**

Kissing Lena on set was always weird. As much as she tried to separate Kara-kissing-Lena from Sara-kissing-Isabelle, there was always the lingering feeling of voyeurism whenever the script called for an intimate moment between them. Kara’s discomfort was only amplified in this case, because while their regular directors were mostly content to just call ‘action’ and let their natural chemistry do most of the work, Miner seemed intent on micromanaging every aspect of the scene, from hand placement to when they should pause for breath.

His direction for the current take had been “Lower and slower,” and Kara was fairly certain that Lena’s hand, curved around her waist and low enough that her pinkie was brushing the back pocket of her jeans, wasn’t actually in the shot any more. Miner also apparently had a fondness for long, uninterrupted takes, and Kara felt like they’d been going through the motions of the embrace long enough for it to feel weird.

_‘Say cut, for god sake,_ ’ Kara thought to herself, unable to open her eyes to see what the holdup was without risking glancing into the camera and ruining the angle. The set was almost silent save for the soft rustle of the crew moving around, so she was sure they hadn’t missed the call, but Kara was sure the take wasn’t supposed to be that long. The kiss dragged on, and Kara could feel Lena getting tenser in her arms until she finally pulled away sharply.

“Are you asleep?” she snapped at the director, who finally yelled for the cut as Lena rounded on him.

“Just trying to capture that _intimacy_ , Luthor!” he replied, his saccharine enthusiasm not quite enough to cover his leer.

“You know this airs on NCB not HBO, right?” Kara pointed out, feeling vaguely uncomfortable with the look on Miner’s face.

“Exactly. I’m not gonna grope my co-star for your amusement,” Lena spat, and Miner shifted uncomfortably in his seat as the crew tried to pretend they weren’t watching the confrontation.

“Keep it classy, Luthor,” he said with a sneer, and Lena tensed and started forward until Kara grabbed her arm reflexively.

“Can we just get on with this, please?” Kara asked plaintively, releasing Lena’s arm when she was satisfied her partner wasn’t going to do something rash.

“Yes, let’s,” Lena agreed, then rounded on the director again. “You just sit there and watch your screens, let us worry about the acting,” she commanded, and Miner sank into his seat and crossed his arms, looking like a sulking child told off by a parent.

“Fine. Again from ‘I thought I’d lost you’!” he called, and Kara and Lena took their places as the crew scurried around them.

Usually when the director called action, it was like Lena flipped a switch somewhere inside herself and simply _became_ Isabelle, but this time the transition was less complete. Kara could still see the frustration sparking in her eyes, but Lena had obviously decided to use it, channelling her anger into passion, and without Miner’s constant corrections, the take turned out better than any they’d done so far.

 “Maybe one more,” he suggested, but Lena had had enough.

“No. We’re done here,” she declared, turning to stalk off the set and ignoring the director calling after her. Kara just shot him a look and hurried after her, hearing him swear to himself and then calling for the lighting guys and set dressers to prepare the next scene.

Kara caught up to Lena halfway between the set and Wardrobe, and tugged her into one of the prop rooms and away from prying eyes.

“This is ridiculous, this script is terrible, that idiot is a sexual harassment complaint waiting to happen…” Lena hissed, pacing restlessly as much as the small room would allow. Kara let her vent, waiting until she ran out of steam and sank against a desk, rubbing a hand across her eyes. “I hate this, Kara,” she whispered, and Kara moved to her side and wrapped her arms around her.

“I know,” she murmured as Lena dropped her head onto her shoulder and sank into the hug. “It’s gonna be okay.”

“They’ll hate us. They’ll think we lied to them,” Lena said softly, and Kara didn’t have to ask who ‘they’ were. Lena adored her fans, almost as much as they adored her, and the prospect of upsetting them would be tearing at her. All of them would hate this episode – even the ones who supported the Jax/Isabelle pairing would feel led on and used – and Lena had very little chance of coming of out this unscathed.

“They’ll understand,” Kara said, but she felt Lena shake her head gently, though she didn’t pull away. Kara pressed a kiss into her hair, where the lipstick mark wouldn’t show, and Lena let out a shuddering breath that washed over Kara’s collarbone. They stayed like that for a couple of minutes, but eventually Lena straightened.

“I have to get changed,” she said, wiping carefully at her eyes. Kara caught her free hand as she turned to go, and squeezed it gently until Lena met her eye.

“I love you. It’s gonna be okay,” she murmured, and Lena smiled genuinely, leaning in to press a careful kiss against her lips before turning and heading for the door.

**…**

Kara headed to craft services while Lena got changed, but found herself inexorably drawn back to the apartment set, led by the same impulse that forced children to pick at scabs. They were just finishing the blocking out when she got there, and Kara picked a secluded corner to lurk in where she wouldn’t be easily seen. The only one to notice her entrance was Mike, and he stiffened minutely when their eyes met before his attention was drawn away by the director.

Kara had seen Lena turn on her smoky-eyed come-hither aura before, had been on the receiving end of it more than once, but watching her do it to Mike was weird in a way that Kara couldn’t really describe. She could tell she wasn’t the only one who felt that way; Mike had his back to the camera when they were shooting Lena’s coverage, which meant he didn’t have to keep his discomfort off his face. His eyes flicked over to Kara more than once, and when it came to filming the actual kiss, Kara lasted exactly half a take before she fled the set, unable to stand the sick feeling clawing at her stomach.

She headed to Lena’s trailer almost automatically, and punched in the code on autopilot. She dropped onto the bed and curled around herself, trying to ignore the ache in her heart, and eventually slipping into the weird place between almost asleep and not quite awake. Kara stayed like that, lost in her own head and dimly aware of the scent of Lena’s shampoo on the pillows beneath her head, until the bed dipped behind her.

“That was weird and I hated it,” Lena murmured, and Kara rolled over so she could wrap her arms around her. They lay there, twined together in their own private bubble as the light faded from the windows, but eventually they rose and left the lot hand in hand. Lena led her back to her apartment and into her bedroom, and the tight feeling that had slipped between Kara’s ribs melted away under her touch. And if she whispered ‘ _mine_ ’ against every inch of skin she kissed, Lena was polite enough not to mention it.

**…**

The remainder of the episode dragged on, but eventually it was done. Kara was sure that once it aired, it would be the hopeless, flaming bellyflop that Cat designed, but until then she was happy to forget it existed. The others seemed to share her opinion, and Lucy dragged them all out to get gloriously drunk once they’d wrapped for the week. Lena was uncharacteristically uninhibited when it came to being drunk in public, matching Lucy drink for drink, and at the end of the night it fell to Kara to usher them all into Ubers. The videos that popped up on Instagram the next morning – more than half of them on Lucy’s account – were all either reasonably tame or too blurry to make out details, and once the hangovers wore off the cast were happy to put the whole thing behind them until it aired.

Then, perhaps inevitably, pictures of Lena and Mike kissing ended up on the internet.

Kara woke up to a slew of messages late one morning, almost three weeks after they’d finished filming _Ergo Propter Hoc_ , and ventured onto twitter to find the fandom in an uproar.

_@KaraDanvers wtf? you said good things for sizzle this isnt good its bullshit_

_what the actual fuck that’s Iz’s apartment wtf is going on?!?_

_no way that’s real. it’s photoshopped, kiddies_

_Are they seriously going with a cheating storyline? Lameeee_

_So either Sizl is dead or Lena still has shitty taste in men =/_

_@LLuthor32 WOOOOO get it gurl_

Her phone rang in her hand as Lena stirred beside her, and she answered it to catch Lucy already mid-rant.

_“—and whoever posted them is obviously trying to start something, because they picked the most ambiguous angle possible.”_

“Good morning to you too,” Kara said, easing out from under Lena’s arm and wriggling into a sitting position. Lena frowned in her sleep and snuggled against Kara’s hip, but didn’t wake.

_“Have you seen…?”_

“Literally just now. What happened?”

_“Someone leaked it. Cat’s furious and the network’s on the warpath. There’s a meeting tomorrow after filming. They’re—”_ Lucy broke off and spoke to someone on her end, then came back. _“I’ve gotta go, but I’ll message you. Don’t let Lena freak out.”_

“I’ll try,” Kara muttered, but she didn’t like her chances.

The next twenty-four hours were hectic. Lena lasted until early afternoon before she thrust her phone at her assistant and refused to take it back, cutting herself off from the online storm, while Kara tried for a while to placate her fans before she realised she couldn’t actually tell them what they wanted to hear without knowing what the network’s line was going to be, and eventually she gave up.

Filming ran long the next day, and as a result, Lena and Kara were both late to the meeting. They entered the room to find all of the cast, as well as a number of the crew that had been on set on the day they filmed the scene. Cat was also there with a man in a suit and a woman that Kara recognised as Miranda Crane, an executive from the network, and she was the one addressing the assembled crowd.

“You will surrender your phones to our legal team,” she said, as Kara and Lena manoeuvred their way over to the rest of the cast. “Only the photo gallery will be searched, and anything not pertinent, including anything illegal, will not be recorded or acted upon.”

“I assume if we point out you have no legal right to do that, it’ll be interpreted as a sign of guilt?” Lucy asked, having both retained some of the legal details she parroted on screen every week and pick up a fair bit from Alex.

“It may give us cause to revisit your contract, yes,” Crane said, unruffled.

“This is ridiculous,” the man in the suit objected. Kara hadn’t caught his name, but judging by his presence and the anger in his eyes, he was new network idiot who’d pushed for the episode in the first places. “Ms Luthor has objected to the leaked scene from the beginning. Why don’t we start with her?” he suggested, and Lena went rigid.

“I didn’t leak it. I _didn’t_ ,” Lena insisted when Network Suit raised an eyebrow, disbelieving. “I’m in the photos, I obviously didn’t take them.”

“You could’ve easily had someone else take them,” he pointed out, but Lena shook her head incredulously.

“The top three stories at the moment are _‘Lena Luthor Torpedos Popular Lesbian Pairing’_ , _‘Lena Luthor Rekindles Romance With Cheating Ex’_ , and _‘Did Lena Luthor Lie About Breakup For Ratings?’_. Why would I possibly want that?”

“So it wasn’t an attempt by you to embarrass the production?” Network Suit asked, and Lena rolled her eyes.

“If I wanted to embarrass the production, I’d release the video of our stunt co-ordinator almost decapitating himself with his own wire rig,” she said, her tone biting, and there was a smattering of laugher from the crew. “This—” she motioned towards the pictures on the tablet, “—only hurts my fans and my reputation.”

“And there’s already someone in this room with a history of leaking photos,” Chet Miner pointed out, shrinking slightly when all eyes turned to him. “What? I’m just saying. Maybe ask Ms Grant where her assistant was.”

Eve paled and shifted behind Cat in what looked like a subconscious move as Mike rounded on the director.

“Leave her out of this, she didn’t leak anything,” he snarled, starting forward until Demos and Vasquez each grabbed one of his arms.

“Ms Teschmacher was with me when the pictures were taken,” Cat said icily, pinning him with a glare. Then she tilted her head and narrowed her eyes. “Interesting that you’re so quick to pass the blame, however.”

He bristled, but in a room full of actors, the fear he was trying to cover was easy to spot. “I don’t like what you’re implying, lady.”

“No, I imagine you don’t.” She looked over at the two executives. “Perhaps you should start with him, Miranda.”

“I think we will. You, come with me,” she said, heading for the door, and two security guys that Kara hadn’t noticed detached themselves from the wall and moved to follow her, snagging Miner as they passed him and ‘escorting’ him after the executive. Network Suit shot Cat a look sparking with anger, but Cat just curved her lips into a feline smile as he followed the others out of the room.

“Don’t you all have work to be doing?” Cat asked after a long, silent pause, and the room emptied quickly.

**…**

The network eventually settled on a ‘no comment’ approach, which protected the plotline and prevented spoilers, but didn’t leave the cast many options for calming their enraged fanbase. Lena and Mike came under a renewed hail of scrutiny, with interest in their personal lives at an all-time high. The paparazzi followed them everywhere, and Kara found herself, for the first time in a long time, feeling somewhat sorry for Mike, who had to deal with not only the cameras and the online storm, but also an increasingly annoyed Eve, who was not taking the implication that her boyfriend was with another woman well. Kara and Lena were far more practised at being discreet, but even they struggled to find time together while the press was watching their every move.

The production and network went into damage control mode, and Kara got a call from Winn late one night, letting her know that she was booked to appear on a news-slash-lifestyle show early the next morning.

“You set this up, you’re coming with me. And then you’re buying me breakfast,” Kara demanded, and Winn laughed and agreed.

**…**

True to his word, Winn showed up the next morning with a coffee in one hand and a pastry in the other, and Kara devoured both of them as he drove her to the studio.

The interview was on _Mornings on NCB_ , one of the top-rated morning news shows in country, and was conducted by one of their regular hosts. Kara waited in the wings of the studio for him to finish her introduction with Winn beside her, whispering encouragement.

“Just remember, be yourself, stick to the talking points, don’t talk about the leaks,” he muttered, nudging her forward as the host announced her name and the studio audience applauded.

Kara strode out onto the stage, smiling out at the cheering crowd. She spotted two girls in the front row, no older than late teens, both wearing shirts emblazoned with the _Dusklight_ logo on a rainbow background, and waved at them, eliciting a pair of delighted grins.

The host, whose name Winn had told her was Jerry, stood as she approached him, and they shook hands and kissed cheeks before settled back into their seats.

The interview was a fairly standard one, starting with questions about her background in _Supergirl_ before leading into _Dusklight_ , and it was designed to give her lots of opportunities to talk about her co-stars and Sizzle without providing context for the leaked photos. It went well, and up until the last two minutes, Kara was happy with her performance.

“And now, just one last question before we let you go: what can you tell us about these set picture that have been floating around for the last few days? Is the show moving away from the gay?”

Kara had to actively stop herself reacting. She could see Winn in the wings, out of sight of the cameras and audience, having a quiet but heated argument with one of the producers, but Kara knew that she’d have to answer the question. They’d been told that Kara couldn’t and wouldn’t address the leaks directly, but by bringing it up in front of a live camera, they’d left her no option other than to respond.

Plastering her biggest, fakest showbiz smile, Kara looked over at the interviewer from under lowered lashes. “Jerry, you know I can’t talk about leaks,” she said, trying to play coy despite the fact that she was furious. “Cat would kill me if I spoiled something.” She shot the audience a conspiratorial look as they laughed, but her eyes caught on the two girls in the front row. Neither of them were smiling, and the blonde one had her hands tightly wrapped around one of her friend’s. The expressions on their faces drove a spike into Kara’s heart; the dark-haired one looked resigned, disappointed but not surprised, but the blonde girl looked like she was fighting to hide her heartbreak, and Kara realised that she owed it to them to say _something_.

“I will…I want to say this, though,” she started, knowing the network would probably be annoyed at her for essentially ruining their hook for the episode but unable to stop herself. “We know how much Sizzle matters to our fans. Representation is important for everyone. Everyone deserves to see themselves reflected in the culture around them, and for a long time, the LGBT community has been denied that. We’re used for cheap ratings stunts or as cautionary tales, and while that’s slowly changing, there’s still a long way to go.” The two girls in the audience had gone still, but Kara couldn’t spare them more than a quick glance, too focused on putting as much sincerity into her words as she could. “What Cat’s doing with _Dusklight_ and Sizzle is a big step forward, and Lena and I are both so honoured to be part of something that touches and uplifts so many people.”

There was a woman with a headset making a ‘wrap it up’ gesture from beside one of the cameras, so Kara went on quickly.

“We see how much this means to you, we know how much it matters, and we’re doing our best to treat it, and our fans, with the respect they deserve.”

“Kara Danvers, everybody! Don’t forget, _Dusklight_ airs on NCB, Tuesday nights at 8pm. We’ll see you after the break!” Jerry said into the camera as the audience cheered.

“And we’re clear!” one of the producers called from the sidelines. Kara and Jerry both stood, and Jerry reached out to shake Kara’s hand, leaning in to make it look like he was kissing her on the cheek.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to ask you that last question,” he whispered in her ear, softly enough to elude their microphones. “The producer insisted.”

“It’s okay,” Kara answered, just as softly. “It gave me an excuse to say all that. The fans needed to hear it.”

He smiled at her again, squeezing her hand before stepping back and turning to talk to a stagehand that had hurried over, and Kara started over towards Winn, fumbling with her microphone as she went. She was so preoccupied with untangling herself that she didn’t actually look at her friend until she reached him, and when she did eventually glance up, it was to see him looking at her with a combination of amazement and horror. He had his phone in one hand and hers in the other, and they were both lighting up with notifications every few seconds while behind him, the producer he’d been arguing with was hurrying away with her phone to her ear.

Kara frowned when she saw him. “What’s wrong?” she asked, plucking her phone from his limp fingers.

“You said ‘ _we’_ ,” he said, sounding dazed. “Please tell me you meant to say ‘we’ and just forgot to warn me because that was live and I’m very good but I can’t unbroadcast something.”

“What are you talking about?” Kara asked, confused but with tendrils of dread stirring in her stomach.

“You said ‘we’re used for ratings stunts’. Kara—” he reached out and took her free hand as Kara glanced reflexively down at her phone when it vibrated again, “—you just came out on national television.”

“I…what?” Kara asked again. The message previews on her phone were all made of all-caps and exclamation points, but her eyes wouldn’t focus long enough to read them. Her stomach flipped as she processed Winn’s words, and she ran back over her speech in her head. “Oh.” She blinked. “Shit.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's gonna get worse before it gets better, but it does get better i swearrr
> 
> also idk if anyone cares, but [my tumblr](http://the-ominous-owl.tumblr.com) has some fun little background headcanon-y type posts for this story that i wrote because i was procrastinating. they're not really relevant to the plot but they were fun to think about. (now with [their own tag](http://the-ominous-owl.tumblr.com/tagged/owly%27s-actor%21au) so you don't have to go trawling through my other shitposts to find them! hooray!)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holy shit, this took me so goddamn long and i'm very sorry. apparently deadlines and i aren't friends? who knew. 
> 
> so friendly reminder that i don't actually know how to tv show, or detective, or doctor. please lower your expectations accordingly.

_ Injury on set of  _ Dusklight

_Ambulances were seen leaving the set of NCB series_ Dusklight _earlier today, sparking rumours of an incident while filming. The studio has since released a statement confirming that one of its actors had been taken to National City General Hospital, but refused to release details of either the injury or the identity of the actor, citing privacy concerns. Series regular Lucy Lane was seen leaving shortly after the medical team, but_ StarFeed _was unable to locate any of the other actors thought to have been filming at the time._

_But was this merely an unfortunate accident, or something else? Insiders tell of tension on set between on-screen sweethearts Lena Luthor and Kara Danvers, allegedly a result of the former_ Supergirl _actress coming out as bisexual late last month. The pair have had a famously turbulent relationship, and while recently they’ve been seen out together at some of National City’s trendiest hotspots (often accompanied by Lane and the rest of the cast), this revelation may just be the straw that broke the camel’s back. While our insiders are quick to back away from accusations of sabotage, they can’t help but agree that these rumours are alarmingly similar to those that once surrounded Luthor’s brother, disgraced film mogul Lex Luthor, back in LuthorFilm’s heyday._

_While the studio is being tight-lipped for now, we here at_ StarFeed _are doing our best to uncover more information about this developing situation, and we’ll be sure to keep our readers updated as more facts come to light._

**…**

“Kara just…sit down, please? It’s gonna be fine,” Winn pleaded, trying to guide her down onto the couch. They were in Winn’s apartment, and Kara was pacing back and forwards in front of his television, fighting the urge to wince every time her phone chimed from Winn’s pocket. He’d confiscated it on the drive over to enforce his No Tweeting Until We Talk demand, because while hardly anyone in the studio had noticed her slip at the time, the internet had picked up on it almost immediately. Her mentions had become a warzone, and Winn didn’t want her wading into the publicity bloodbath until they’d decided what she was going to say.

“I just…I can’t believe I did that,” Kara whispered, then rounded on her friend. “Why did you let me do that?”

“I didn’t know you were going to!” he objected, catching her shoulders to stop her pacing. “Kara, stop. It’s alright. It’s not a bad thing, okay?”

She let him hold her in place and stared at him, eyes wide. Her stomach hadn’t stopped churning since they’d left the studio, and Kara still wasn’t entirely sure she wasn’t going to throw up. “What do I do?”

“It’s okay.” He pushed her gently down onto the couch. “Sit. Relax. Breathe.”

She did as he asked, taking a deep breath and then releasing it slowly, and felt her heartrate settle slightly. It picked up again a second later, when Winn’s phone trilled from his pocket.

“It’s okay, it’s just James,” Winn said, bringing the phone to his ear. “Hi. Whatever you’re about to say—” He paused, and Kara could hear James’ voice rattling through the speaker, though it wasn’t loud enough for her to work out what he was saying. Her finger twisted nervously together in her lap as Winn paced in front of her. “I didn’t know she was going to! I obviously…No, no, don’t book her on anything until we come up with a plan…No just… Just give me an hour, I’ll call you back.” He hung up, then dropped down to sit next to Kara.

“Is James mad?” she asked, but Winn shook his head.

“No! No, he’s just worried about you,” he assured her, squeezing her hand. “But it’s gonna be okay. I promise.”

Kara let out another long, slow breath and nodded, and Winn smiled.

“Good. Okay,” he muttered, squeezing her hand again. “So just, don’t freak out, but we have maybe half an hour to get out in front of this before it goes properly viral, and—”

Kara head shot up and she looked at him with wide eyes. “Winn! You said—”

“No, no, it’s okay! It’s fine. It just means you have to decide what you wanna do. How you wanna handle this.”

Kara frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well, basically you have three options,” Winn said, counting them off on his free hand. “I could probably walk it back, if that’s what you wanted. We can say you misspoke, or you’re being misinterpreted…”

“I’m not, though,” Kara objected. “I mean, I didn’t mean to say it, but they’re not wrong, and…” she trailed off and took another breath. “I’m so tired of hiding, Winn. It feels like I’m lying to everyone and I hate it.”

“Okay, so no denial. In that case, you can either avoid it, hedge around it if someone asks, not address it directly. Use the whole ‘no labels’ approach, or…”

“Or?”

“Or just outright confirm it,” Winn said with a shrug. “Release a statement, come all the way out. Kara Danvers, Out and Proud…bisexual?” he asked, tilting his head, and Kara nodded slowly. “Cool. Kara Danvers, Out and Proud Bisexual. Take control of the story before the tabloids get their teeth into it.”

Kara blinked at him. “Just like that?” she asked, unable to comprehend it being that easy.

“Just like that,” Winn said, nodding. “It’s not nearly as big a deal these days. Hell, Lucy came out via a reaction gif and the internet only melted down a bit.”

“Yeah, but that’s _Lucy_. She can just…do things.” Kara said, then glanced down reflexively when her phone chimed from Winn’s pocket again. “Has Lena…?”

Winn released her hand to retrieve her phone. He thumbed through it quickly and then shook his head. “Not yet,” he said with an apologetic smile that turned into a more alarmed expression as he scrolled further into her notifications. “But you should message Alex before she calls in a SWAT team.”

He handed it over, and Kara typed out a quick reply to her sister’s string of increasingly concerned messages, the last of which read, “ _Answer me or I’m tracking your phone and coming over there.”_

_sry,. with winn, he had my cell. working out plan. ttyl. <3_

Having averted the possibility of Alex breaking down Winn’s door, Kara skimmed through her other messages. She’d messaged Lena on the drive over before Winn had confiscated her phone, but Lena hadn’t responded. It was possible that she was filming and hadn’t checked her messages, or that she’d given her phone to Jess again. She’d been doing that more often since the leak, cutting herself off from the online storm that was only just starting to abate. The fandom was still split on whether or not the pictures were in-character, a fight not aided by the interviews Mike had given in the days following the leak. He’d been cagey and defensive, and had ended up implying that he and Lena had never actually broken up, a move that had annoyed Lena, enraged Eve, and that Kara still wasn’t convinced had been accidental.

Kara stared down at her unanswered message to Lena, tapping her finger against her phone. After a brief internal debate, Kara hit the call button, fidgeting anxiously as it rang. And rang. And rang. Frustrated, Kara hung up and tried again, with the same result. She sat through Lena’s voicemail message, surprised to find that even a canned recording of her voice was enough to calm some of the butterflies in her stomach, and left a short message.

“Hey, it’s me. I guess you’re on set or something. Call me when you get this? I love you. Bye.”

The message felt rambling and insufficient, but Winn was shifting impatient next to her, and his warning that they were on a deadline was nudging at the anxiety in her stomach, so she pushed thoughts of Lena to one side and tucked her phone away. Then, taking a deep breath, Kara looked up at Winn. “Okay. How do we do this?”

It turned out to be surprisingly easy. All it took was a short but heartfelt message that Kara rewrote six times before Winn confiscated the tablet, posting it across her social media accounts before she lost her nerve. Comments flooded in, and Winn frowned intently down at his screen as Kara slumped back onto the couch, feeling drained. The nervous energy that had been sustaining her for the last hour had leaked away, leaving her rubbing her eyes with a vaguely sick feeling in her stomach.

She stayed where she was, eyes closed and limbs heavy, until Winn blinked up at her, apparently so focused on his task that he’d forgotten she was there. He shooed her out politely, promising to call if anything came up.

“But Kara, trust me, it’s gonna be fine. I promise,” he told her as he enfolded her in a hug, and she squeezed him tightly in a wordless show of gratitude. “Just maybe stay out of your mentions for a few hours,” he suggested as they broke apart. “Give me a chance to go on troll patrol.”

Kara didn’t think she’d have the nerve to brave her social media for days anyway, but she agreed. Her phone was still vibrating in her pocket every couple of minutes, but none of the messages were from people Kara felt up to talking to. Lena still hadn’t replied, and when Kara finally left Winn’s apartment, it was with one destination in mind.

**…**

Kara let herself into Lena’s apartment with her key, calling out softly as the door swung shut behind her.

“Lena?”

“In here,” came the reply after a long pause, and Kara followed her voice into the living room. Lena was standing with one arm folded across her stomach and the other holding a glass of scotch to her temple. Her attention was focused on the television, and she didn’t react when Kara came to stand beside her.

It took Kara a moment to recognise herself on the screen, but when she did she realised that Lena was watching a clip of her interview on a loop. It was obviously from a later broadcast, one that had edited in B-roll footage of the audience reactions, because as Kara answered the final question of the interview, the camera cut to the two girls in the front row, clutching each other and looking utterly overjoyed. The sight of such a visceral reaction to her words made something warm move in Kara’s chest, and she caught herself smiling until Lena sighed heavily.

“I can’t believe you did that,” she said, muting the TV and tossing the remote onto the couch behind her.

“I didn’t mean to,” Kara said, wincing internally at Lena’s tone. “It just sort of…slipped out. There were these two girls in the audience and…”

“Did it ‘just slip out’ onto Instagram as well?” Lena asked, turning to face her. Her eyes were red-rimmed and dark, and she was speaking with the same overly-precise care she took at cons when she’d been drinking and didn’t want her fan to notice. Kara glanced over at the bar against the far wall and saw a half-empty bottle of scotch that she was sure had been full the last time she’d been there.

“I tried to call you,” Kara said, feeling herself getting defensive and tamping it down. “Your phone kept going to voicemail, and Winn said I had to say _something_ before it went viral.”

“And you decided to do _that_? Just casually come out to the world?”

“I’d pretty much done that anyway…” Kara muttered, then took a step towards her girlfriend, resting a hand on her arm. “Lena, c’mon. Winn says it’s gonna be okay, and—”

“Oh, well if _Winn says_ I guess it’s fine, then,” Lena snapped, draining her glass and shrugging off Kara’s hand, moving over to the bar to pour another drink.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Kara was startled by the ferocity of her partner’s response. She’d expected Lena to be surprised, maybe annoyed that Kara hadn’t talked to her about it first, but Lena hadn’t been that icy with her since her early days on the show, and Kara was at a loss.

“What’s wrong is that this _isn’t what we agreed_ , Kara,” Lena hissed, turning to face her. “We said we’d lie low, not announce ourselves to the world on the most-watched breakfast show in the country.”

“I didn’t announce _us_ ,” Kara objected, anger stirring in her stomach. “I _accidentally_ outed myself. I barely mentioned you.”

“It will draw attention to us!”

“Why is that so bad?”

“Because!” Lena snapped. “I _cannot_ come out, Kara. I’ve told you that. I dated National City’s favourite frat boy for almost three years specifically to avoid it.”

“So what then?” Kara asked, trying to restrain her temper and only partially succeeding. “Was the plan to spend the rest of our lives lying to everyone? Just hide forever?”

Lena let out a harsh, mirthless laugh and swallowed half her glass in one go. “Not forever. My mother will die eventually.” She sank down onto the lounge, the anger in her posture leaking away. “I guess it doesn’t matter now,” she murmured, staring at the screen with unfocused eyes.

“Lena…” Kara started, but Lena cut her off.

“I need some time, Kara. Can you just go?” Kara just stared at her, feeling like she’d been punched in the stomach, and after a long moment Lena finally looked at her. Her expression was carefully blank, but Kara could see the turmoil under the thin sheen of tears in her eyes. “Please, Kara. Just go,” she said again, her voice wobbling, and Kara turned and stalked out of the apartment, resisting the urge to look back.

**…**

Upon opening the door, Alex took one look at Kara’s tearstained face and folded her sister into a hug. “What happened?” she asked gently, tugging Kara into her apartment and guiding her down onto the couch and into Lucy’s waiting arms.

Kara told them everything, heedless of the tears rolling down her cheeks, and by the time she’d talked herself out her head was pillowed in Alex’s lap and Lucy was running a hand up and down her calf.

“Well shit,” Lucy sighed after a long moment of silence. She sighed again and shook her head, then shifted until could slide out from under Kara’s legs and stand up, swiping her motorcycle keys off the coffee table.

“Where are you going?” Alex asked, shooting her partner a look as she wriggled into her leathers and picked up her helmet.

“Lena’s.”

“Seriously?” Alex sounded incredulous, and Kara tilted her head up in time to catch the pointed glance her sister shot between her and Lucy.

“Kara’ll be fine, she’s gonna eat everything in the apartment and then sleep for twelve hours,” Lucy said, ignoring Kara’s half-hearted attempt at indignation. “Lena, on the other hand, is gonna drink herself into a coma if we leave her unsupervised.”

“Fine,” Alex said shortly. “Go, then.”

Lucy paused and turned back with a frown at her tone. “Alex…” she started, but Alex took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

“Sorry. I’m mad at her, not you.” Lucy was still looking at her with a concerned frown, but Alex forced a small smile. “Go check on her,” she said, sounding more genuine.

Lucy crossed the room to stand in front of them, and Kara heard the rustle of her bike jacket as she leaned down to kiss Alex gently. “I love you,” she murmured, then crouched down so she was eye-level with Kara. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Kara echoed, her voice scratching in her throat.

“You did a really brave thing today. I’m proud of you,” Lucy said softly, and Kara smiled weakly at her. “It’s gonna be okay.” Lucy leaned forward to plant a kiss on her forehead, then stood and moved towards the door. “Don’t wait up. Kara, you have one-off permission to eat my chocolate. Don’t get crumbs in the bed,” she called over her shoulder as she disappeared.

“She’s right, you know,” Alex murmured after a long minute of silence, stroking a hand through Kara’s hair. “It is gonna be okay.”

“It doesn’t feel okay,” Kara said. She’d stopped crying, but inside she still felt hollow, like her stomach had twisted in on itself. “Lena broke up with me. That doesn’t feel okay.”

“She said she needed time, that’s not the same as a breakup,” Alex pointed out.

“Isn’t that what Maggie said to you? That she needed time and space? Look how that turned out,” Kara snapped, then felt a fresh wave of guilt as soon as the words had left her mouth.

Alex inhaled sharply, and her hand stilled for a moment before resuming its path through Kara’s hair. “You’re upset, so I’m ignoring that _very cheap shot_ ,” she said, and Kara mumbled out an apology. “Lena will come around, Kar. She’s been completely gone on you since you messed up your line and fell on her.”

Kara smiled at the memory of her first day on set, but it slid off her face after a moment. “She’s really serious about being private, though. Even after she and Mike stopped their thing,” Kara said, rolling onto her back so she could see Alex’s face. “I knew that. I _knew_ she didn’t want people to know. Why the hell did I…”

“Hey, stop. C’mon,” Alex said, jostling her lightly. “Lucy’s right, what you did today was brave.”

“It was stupid.”

Alex jostled her again. “It was _brave_ , Kara. Whatever hang-up Lena has about it doesn’t change the fact that it was really brave.” Kara sighed, and Alex twisted to grab Kara’s phone from the arm of the couch. “Look at this.”

Kara shuffled until she could see the screen, then frowned when she realised she was looking at her own twitter mentions. “Winn said I shouldn’t…” she started, but Alex shook her head.

“Winn worries too much. Read.”

So Kara scrolled, and what she found brought fresh tears to her eyes. Her fanbase was in an uproar, and her mentions were a storm of ebullient tweets and incoherent screaming. Her name was trending, as was a line from her message that someone had turned into a hashtag. There were touching, heartfelt messages thanking her for her strength, and Kara only got through a few of them before her eyes were too blurred with tears to see the screen.

“See? You did good,” Alex said softly, and Kara gave in to the sob building her chest, rolling over to bury her face in her sister’s stomach. “It’s gonna be okay, Kar.” Her voice had a slight wobble, but her hand was steady as she stroked Kara’s hair, and she made no complaint as Kara, overwhelmed and emotionally exhausted, cried herself to sleep in her lap.

**…**

Being on the set the next day was odd. Kara was nervous and antsy when she arrived, unsure what the reception would be, but her fears quickly proved to be unfounded. As soon as she walked into Wardrobe, Kara found herself engulfed in two sets of arms. It took her a second to identify her captors as Vasquez and Demos, both in various states of undressed and apparently completely unbothered by it.

“You are such a dork,” Vasquez told her, but her smile was fond, and when Demos pulled out his phone to snap a selfie, she pressed a kiss against Kara’s cheek and held that pose. When the pair finally released her, Kara’s glasses were askew and her hair was mussed, but the warm feeling in her chest was almost strong enough to make her forget that Lena hadn’t contacted her yet.

The hair-and-makeup crew were their usual chatty selves, and while none of them mentioned Kara’s revelation from the day before, she did notice that someone had used several shades of lipstick to draw a tiny pride flag on the mirror in front of her usual chair.  The assistant working on Kara’s hair noticed her looking at it and winked at her in the mirror, but made no other comment, instead continuing his story of his dog’s latest exploits.

There was no overt reaction when she finally got to the soundstage, but Kara did receive more than a few warm smiles from the crew that were milling around. There were also a couple of dark looks, but they were easy enough to ignore. Snapper was his usual surly self, but Kara thought she detected slightly less bite to his traditional greeting of “You’re late, Danvers,” which was enough to add genuine warmth to her apology as she walked over to where Vas and Demos were pretending to shoot each other with their prop guns while they waited.

It was a fairly easy day, shooting wise, mostly walk-and-talk scenes, and Kara let the positive energy of the set and her scene partners carry her through, striving to distract herself from the ache of worry in her chest that grew every time she checked her phone to find no messages from Lena. She’d had a couple from Lucy, one in the early hours of the morning that had auto-corrected itself into incoherence and another just after they broke for lunch that simply read _“your girlfriend is hungover but okay”_ followed by a string of emojis that Kara couldn’t decipher.

Feeling morose and unable to deal with the press of people gathered at craft services, Kara instead opted to head for the relative privacy of her trailer. She was walking with her head down, focused on her phone, which is why she didn’t see the hand that darted out to grab her arm, dragging her into a prop room as she passed the door.

“Shhhh,” her assailant hissed when Kara yelped and pulled away sharply, but she relaxed when her eyes adjusted to the low light.

“Lena! You scared me,” Kara murmured, unsure why they were whispering but following Lena’s lead.

“Sorry. I just can’t…people, right now,” Lena said, waving her hand vaguely towards the door, and Kara frowned, concerned. Lena was wearing the same clothes she’d been in yesterday, and her eyes were covered by dark glasses, despite the already-dim room.

“Are you okay?” Kara asked, taking in the slump of Lena’s shoulders and resisting the desire to reach for her.

“I’m fine,” Lena insisted, straightening her posture with visible effort. Her hands were twisting together over her stomach, and the parts of her face that Kara could see looked pale in the dim light spilling from the hallway.

There was a long, awkward silence as they both just looked at each other. Just seeing Lena had eased the ache in Kara’s heart, but the fact that she wouldn’t meet her eye was rapidly bringing it back.

Lena opened and closed her mouth several times before finally forcing herself to say, “Kara listen… I’m sorry for snapping at you last night. It was unfair of me.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not. I reacted badly and I shouldn’t have. It won’t happen again.”

Kara frowned. Lena’s apology, while sincere, also sounded formal and rehearsed. It sounded almost like she was reading from an autocue, and the ache in Kara’s chest finally pushed her to speak.

“Lena,” Kara broke in, interrupting the practised flow of Lena’s words. “Will you please just _talk_ to me?”

“I am,” she said, but her face was carefully blank. Kara shook her head sadly.

“You’re not. You sound like you’re at a press conference, reading from a script.” Kara stepped forward, into Lena’s space, and brought a hand up to slide the sunglasses off her face. “I love you. Just talk to me.”

Lena slumped back against the bench behind her, all rigidity gone from her posture. Without the glasses, Kara could see her eyes were red-rimmed and bloodshot from crying, and the dark circles underneath them spoke of a night of little sleep.

“I can’t…I don’t…” Lena looked lost, and when Kara stepped towards her again she didn’t withdraw, leaning into the hand that Kara rested on her arm.

“It’s okay, Lena. Whatever it is, it’s okay.”

“It’s not. I can’t…I can’t _do_ this, Kara. I can’t be what you need…what they need.” She motioned toward the phone in Kara’s hand. “They already expect so much of us, and with this…I just can’t. I’ll end up disappointing them.”

“Lena, no,” Kara breathed, her heart breaking, but Lena shook her head.

“I will. I’m not like you and Lucy, I’ve never been good with people.” She smiled sadly, blinking tears out of her eyes. “Lex was always the people-person. I’m no good at it. I don’t deserve the praise they give me.”

“Hey,” Kara interrupted, squeezing her arm. “I would fight anyone else who said that about you. You’re not allowed either.”

Lena’s smile grew tender at that, but soon faded. “Kara, you don’t…My mother…” She cut herself off with a bitter laugh. “My mother. That’s a whole other thing….” Suddenly Lena straightened, pushing off the bench she’d been leaning on and pulling out of Kara’s grip. “I just think we should take some space,” she said, the formal tone back in her voice, and Kara felt her heart stop.

“Lena, please,” she whispered, but Lena shook her head.

“Just until this blows over.” Lena paused to wipe the tears off her face, but when she looked up, her eyes were full of enough naked longing to paralyse Kara completely. “I love you,” she murmured, stepping forward.

The kiss, when it came, was desperate, tasting of tears and full of a thousand things Lena couldn’t say, and when Kara’s back hit the wall, the impact was nothing compared to the pounding of her heart. They stayed like that, locked together and falling into each other until a door slammed somewhere nearby. Lena pulled back abruptly, and by the time Kara had put enough of herself back together to react, she was gone.

**…**

Filming was miserable. Their scenes together were clunky, Lena too closed off and Kara too miserable about it to allow for their usual chemistry to work, and it was enough to have Snapper scowling at them from behind his screens and the crew muttering to each other between takes. They knew _something_ had happened, but the few people who had details weren’t sharing them, and in the absence of fact, rumours abounded. A small group of junior assistants from various departments had taken to hovering around Kara between takes, alternating between watching her with something approaching awe and shooting Lena dark looks. Kara heard the word ‘homophobic’ muttered more than once, and her attempts to get them to stop seemed to have to opposite effect.

“You don’t have to protect her,” one of them told Kara quietly, oblivious to Kara’s consternation. “You shouldn’t have to put up with bigotry from anyone, even the lead.”

“She’s not a bigot—” Kara started, but the assistant just patted her arm consolingly and scurried away.

Lena was quiet and withdrawn, slightly too subdued to fully sell her Ice Queen act, and while Kara wasn’t avoiding her exactly, her heart was still too raw for her to seek her out specifically. When they did speak it was awkward, both of them swapping small talk and stilted platitudes, and Lena usually ended the conversation quickly. While Kara was striving to give Lena the space she’d asked for, their characters were – if the rumours from the writers’ room were to be believed – working their way towards a proposal at the end of the season, and most of their scenes together were peppered with the kind of easy intimacy that left Kara with a hollow yearning in her chest.

The fandom was, as far as Kara could tell, experiencing a collective and ongoing meltdown. The crew’s inability to keep gossip to themselves meant that the fans were aware of the new divide, and they had apparently split themselves into different camps. One group were firmly on Team Kara, loudly declaring Lena ‘unstanned’ (a word that Kara had to look up) and ‘cancelled’ (which she worked out on her own), barraging Kara with support and Lena with vitriol in equal measure. Their opposites had apparently picked Lena as the new mascot for the anti-queer movement, to her horror, and tweeted her daily messages thanking her for ‘resisting the fall to the homosexual agenda’, which Kara would’ve found absolutely hilarious if it hadn’t made her want to sob. There were fans somewhere between the two camps who talked more about what it would mean for the show going forward, along with Kara’s favourite group – whom she’d nicknamed Team Sanity in her head – who were busy reminding people that the rumour mill was a trash fire and even if it was true, it was none of their business. 

The firestorm in the fandom was not helped by the fact that it was close enough to the airing of _Ergo Propter Hoc_ that they’d begun promoting it, and a selection of publicity stills had been released, including a higher quality version of the pictures of Jax and Isabelle. Despite the fact that they’d filmed the episode months before, the timing of it was enough to spark a near riot in the shipping parts of the fandom, and Kara saw more than one theory suggesting that Lena had killed Sizzle because she was uncomfortable around Kara before she stopped checking her social media altogether out of sheer frustration.

When she wasn’t working, Kara spent most of her time with Alex, who found herself with an almost equal amount of free time on her hands. Her captain was still reluctant to allow her to investigate anything even tangentially related to the entertainment industry, which in National City was just about everything, and Lucy was spending most evenings trying to drag Lena out of her self-imposed isolation. While Alex agreed that Lena needed at least one friend looking out for her, Kara could tell that she missed her girlfriend, and most of their nights together devolved into them eating ice-cream and sobbing over rom-coms.

The network was ostensibly oblivious to the unrest in the fandom, and were promoting _Ergo Propter Hoc_ heavily. Kara thought it was probably Network Suit’s last-ditch attempt to ensure its success, but in one of their depressingly rare conversations, Lena suggested that it was just him being petty and forcing them to talk about it.  Because Lena and Mike had heavier filming schedules that the rest of the cast, the majority of promotion fell to Kara and Lucy, and Kara spent several of her days off in the studios of various lifestyle-slash-entertainment type shows, trying her best to build hype for an episode she absolutely hated.

**…**

“It’s just such an honour to meet you, Ms Danvers,” the PA said as she led Kara through the warren of corridors that made up the _National City Tonight!_ studio. Kara thought her name was Kelly, but she wasn’t sure enough to use it, so instead just smiled as genuinely as she could and nodded. Lucy had sent her a snapchat from set earlier of Lena scowling at Lars, the stunt co-ordinator, as he’d fitted her with a harness, and Kara was still trying to tamp down the miserable longing that it had elicited. “My daughters just loved you in _Supergirl,_ and my eldest…Sizzle is so special to her, you know.”

“I can sign something for them after the taping, if you like,” Kara offered, trying to force thoughts of Lena from her head. The woman beamed and gushed her gratitude, and Kara focused on her joy, trying to let the words ‘ _Sizzle is so important to her’_ and the unspoken message behind them drown out the persistent ache in her heart.

“Okay, we’re just in here,” the PA said, gesturing towards an open door just as Kara’s phone vibrated in her pocket.

“Sorry, I have to take this,” Kara said, seeing Lucy’s face grinning at her from the screen. “I’m so sorry, I won’t be a second.” Then, into her phone, “I’m about to go on, Luce, I can’t—”

_“Don’t care,”_ Lucy interrupted, her tone serious. _“Don’t panic, okay? There was an accident.”_

“What?” Kara stopped dead in her tracks as her heart plummeted. “Who—Alex? What happened, is she okay?”

_“No, no, not Alex. She’s coming to get you. There was an accident on set. Alex is gonna take you to the hospital.”_

“Hospital?” Kara repeated as her heart tripped in her chest and dread curled in her stomach. “Who got hurt?”

_“Don’t freak out. Just… stay calm and don’t freak out.”_

“Lucy!”

_“It’s Lena.”_

**…**

Looking back, Kara couldn’t remember most of the drive over. Her memory of the time between the studio and the hospital was just moments of sharp clarity jumping out from a fog of blind panic. Herself, running past a confused PA, babbling apologies; Lucy’s voice in her ear as she almost fell out onto the street; Alex’s hands twisting on the steering wheel of her departmental car, twitching towards the switch for the lights and sirens every couple of seconds.

At the hospital, Alex led her up several flights of stairs, perhaps sensing that Kara wouldn’t stand still long enough to take the elevator. They emerged into a hallway, and Kara followed the sound of familiar voices to a small waiting room where she found half the cast and a decent chunk of the crew. Lucy was folded into one of the uncomfortable hospital chairs with Mike on one side and Demos on the other, but when she caught sight of Kara she stood and approached her.

“Kara! She’s okay, she—”

“Where is she?” Kara demanded, heading automatically towards the closest door. Her body was on autopilot, her mind far too overwhelmed with dread and the sharp antiseptic smell of the hospital to do much in the way of rational thinking, but Lucy caught her before she got more than two steps.

“Not that one. _That_ one,” she said, pointing to a door on the opposite wall. Kara started towards it, but Lucy stepped in front of her again and stopped her with a hand on each shoulder. “The doctors are in there, give it a minute. You can see her in a minute.”

Kara considered pushing past her and going in anyway – her pounding heart was insisting she do _something_ – but Alex caught up to her before she could move, gripping her hand tightly and tugging her towards the row of chairs along the wall.

“What happened?” Kara asked as Alex urged her to sit and Lucy sank into the seat next to her.

“The stunt went wrong. There was something wrong with the rig; she overshot the pad and hit the wall,” Lucy said gently, reaching over to squeeze Kara’s hand as she stiffened. “Production’s halted while OSHA and SAG do their thing, but it shouldn’t take long. We were filming when it happened, so they’ve got the footage.”

“Where’s Lars?” Kara asked, glancing around the room for the first time and realising that the stunt co-ordinator was notably absent.

“Talking to OSHA,” Lucy answered, contempt all over her face. “He’s insisting it wasn’t his fault, but it doesn’t look good for him. He’s probably gonna lose his job.”

“He’d better.” Guilt was curling in Kara’s stomach, churning with the fear already there. It must have shown on her face, because Lucy frowned at her and squeezed her hand again.

“It’s not your fault, Kar,” Alex said softly. “From the sounds of it, that idiot shouldn’t have been anywhere near a set to begin with.”

“I knew he was incompetent. I _knew_. I should’ve said something when I realised _I_ knew more about wire work than he did, but I…”

“It’s not on you, Kara. We all saw it. Any one of us could have said something,” Lucy told her, and something in her tone caught Kara’s attention even through her panicked haze. Forcing herself to focus, she took a moment to study her friend, noticing how pale Lucy was under the remains of her stage make-up and the faint streaks around her eyes where her mascara had run and been hurriedly wiped away.

“Are you okay, Luce?” Alex asked her softly, and Kara realised suddenly that Lucy had been filming with Lena when the accident happened and would have seen the whole thing.

“I’m fine. It’s not me in there,” Lucy said, nodding towards Lena’s room, but when Alex shifted closer to her Lucy closed her eyes and leaned forward, resting her head against Alex’s hip as Alex brought a hand up to stroke her hair. It was a surprisingly public display of vulnerability from Lucy, who liked to encourage the belief that she was functionally invincible. Kara brought their joined hands onto her lap, running her thumb over Lucy’s knuckles as Lucy took a shuddering breath. “I’m getting make-up on your pants,” she mumbled against Alex’s thigh, eliciting a smile from both sisters.

“It’s not the worst thing you’ve got on my pants,” Alex murmured with a wry smile, huffing out a laugh at the expression on Kara’s face before continuing, “I wouldn’t worry about the stunt guy. I doubt Cat will let him near the set again.”

“He’ll be lucky if Cat doesn’t eviscerate him,” Lucy said, raising her head and swiping at her eyes with her free hand. “Lena’s her favourite. She won’t—”

She broke off as the door to Lena’s room opened and a white-coated man stepped out, writing in a file and trailed by a nurse in scrubs. Kara was moving to stand in front of him before she’d even realised that she’d stood up, with Alex and Lucy half a step behind her.

“Is Lena okay?” Kara demanded, and the doctor looked up, startled to find his path blocked.

“Are you family of Ms Luthor?” he asked, looking around at the group of people crowded in the waiting room.

“I…sort of?”

“Without Ms Luthor’s permission, I’m afraid I can only talk to her family,” the doctor said firmly, flipping his file closed.

“We are her family,” Lucy told him just as decisively, moving to stand on Kara’s other side. The crew had withdrawn to the other side of the waiting room, giving the three of them some measure of privacy, but Kara could tell the closest of them were straining to listen.

“Her _legal_ family, I mean,” the doctor corrected, though he suddenly looked a lot less sure of himself. It took Kara a second to realised that it was because Alex had twitched her jacket to the side, revealing the badge that was still clipped to her belt, and some very distant part of her was glad that her sister hadn’t swept it back far enough to uncover the gun on her hip. The hallway was hardly private, and the last thing they needed was a headline screaming “ _Cast of Dusklight Ejected From Hospital for Threatening Medical Staff”_.

“Excuse me,” a voice interrupted from the corner before Alex had to make her implicit threat explicit, and Kara glanced over her shoulder to see Jess, Lena’s assistant, unfolding herself from a chair, tucking both of the phones she’d been typing on into separate pockets and approaching them. “I think you’ll find that Ms Danvers is listed as Ms Luthor’s next-of-kin. If that won’t suffice, I can have her attorney send over the paperwork confirming me as her medical proxy.”

Kara’s heart tripped in her chest. She didn’t know Lena had done that, and the fact that she hadn’t undone it after Kara had come out sent a little spike of warmth through her until she tamped it down.

The doctor let out a sigh. “Sure, that’ll do. Ms Luthor has a minor concussion, some fractured ribs and assorted bruising. She’s also dehydrated, but I think that’s unrelated to the accident. All her injuries are relatively minor, considering. A couple of weeks of taking it easy and she should make a full recovery.”

Kara let out a long breath, feeling a flood of relief as Alex squeezed her shoulder and Lucy visibly relaxed.

“We’re keeping her in for observation, at least overnight, to make sure the head injury isn’t worse than it looks and get some fluids into her, but you should be able to take her home tomorrow afternoon,” the doctor continued, smiling at their reactions.

“Can I see her?” Kara asked hesitantly. Lena had been avoiding her for weeks, but surely there was a you-were-in-actual-danger exception to her desire for space. If Lena told her to leave, she would, but until then, the need to actually see her was too pressing to ignore.

“She’s sedated at the moment, but you’re welcome to sit with her. Only two or three at a time, though,” he said, glancing pointedly at the group still huddled in the corner.

“Why is she sedated? Is that normal?” Alex asked with a frown as Lucy turned to corral the crew.

“Ms Luthor was quite distressed when she was brought in, and requested sedation. It’s not uncommon.”

Kara ducked away as Alex continued interrogating the doctor, heading for the door Lucy had pointed out earlier. She knocked on it softly, mostly out of habit, then pushed it open.

Lena was curled on her side, which couldn’t have been comfortable with fractured ribs, but Kara knew she hated sleeping on her back with a passion. There was an IV line snaking out of her wrist, and from where she was standing Kara could see the beginnings of a mottled bruise on her shoulder peeking out from under the hospital gown.

Crossing the room slowly, Kara sank down into the chair by the bed, reaching hesitantly for Lena’s hand once she was settled.

“Lena?” she murmured softly, squeezing her hand.

Lena stirred slightly but didn’t wake, mumbling something softly as she shifted, and while Kara thought she heard her own name more than once, she was more comforted by the way Lena had curled her fingers tightly around her hand and refused to let go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> see, i promised i'd give lena a break (or fracture). that was totally what you meant, right guys?
> 
> because i crave validation, y'all should definitely check out my [my tumblr](http://the-ominous-owl.tumblr.com/), which has lots of fun things, including a bunch of random [headcanons](http://the-ominous-owl.tumblr.com/tagged/owly%27s-actor%21au) about this au. 
> 
> also like, comment and stuff coz that'd be awesome and i'll love you

**Author's Note:**

> i'm on [ tumblr.](the-ominous-owl.tumblr.com/) come flail with me. or at me, don't really mind.


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